Dorothy's favorite fashion junk:

Site name remains anonymous due to profanity:

B'Fun

A Scene From the Life of Beyonce:

(I suggest clicking on the picture to enlarge it)

BEYONCE: So what are you saying?

BEYONCE'S CONCERNED STAFF MEMBER: Those pants were in your dressing room for a reason.

BEYONCE: Pants?

BCSM: We TALKED about how you weren't going to wear hot pants any more. Remember?

BEYONCE: I would never have agreed to that. I'm the president of the American branch of the International Society for the Promotion of Short Shorts.

BCSM: I don't even think that exists.

BEYONCE: I can forward you the newsletter.

BCSM: Can you please just go change into something that doesn't make you look like you forgot to wear bottoms?

BEYONCE: I just don't think that's ever going to happen.

The fun girls are the best. If you want to know where this comes from, email Dorothy.

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Blue Bunny freaking rocks

Have you ever complained about a product before? I never had before a few weeks ago. My dad and mom are so anti complaining. But when I opened my blue bunny heath ice cream bar, I was pretty disappointed. The bar was basically devoid of toffee bits. Everyone (i.e., Rachel Williams), said I should write the company and complain, so I did. A week later, I received a letter in the mail:

Dear Ms. Ward,

Thank you for your Internet message concerning a recent purchase of the BLUE BUNNY Heath Ice Cream Bar, which you described as not containing many toffee bits in the chocolate.

Wow, they actually read my complaint.

I would like to reassure you that Wells' Dairy, Inc. is a responsible food manufacturer and we enforce strict quality control procedures so we can offer premium quality products to our customers.

Good thing they told me that. I was beginning to think Wells' Dairy was an irresponsible food manufacturer.

However, your description suggests that this particular bar may have been at the beginning of the production line run and the ingredient feeder was not fully operational, or may have jammed up, thus preventing the appropriate amount of ingredients from being added to the chocolate.

Ah ha, I see!

Therefore, we will discuss this incident at our weekly supervisors meeting and with the individual production personnel to reinforce the importance of monitoring this manufacturing step and maintaining our high quality standards.

You're going to discuss the toffee bit problem at the weekly supervisor's meeting AND with the individual production personnel? Are you going to line them up and wave my complaint in front of them and yell about the importance of toffee?

Ms. Ward, we appreciate you informing us of this incident so a recurrence can be prevented...I have enclosed a coupon, redeemable for a BLUE BUNNY product, to reimburse you for your purchase of this product, and any inconvenience that this may have caused you.

Good, cause those missing toffee bits were a big inconvenience!

Sincerely,

And then "Jackie" actually signed her name.

While I definitely didn't take the incident as seriously as Jackie took it(and likely her fellow supervisors and those poor individual production personnel), my husband and I did appreciate the free ice cream. Blue Bunny is pretty cool.

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Pop Quiz

Nathaniel and Dorothy

What is his name? Nathaniel George Ward
What is your name? Dorothy Allison Hatch Ward (Freak, what a name)
How long have you been married? Something like six months.
How long did you date? Um, four months, approximately.
How old is he? He's 24, today!
Who eats more? He does, but not by a lot.
Who said I love you first? Nathaniel totally pulled one on me and made me say it first. He asked what my definition of love is and then asked me if I could say that about him. What was I supposed to say? But I did love him then. That was a great night.
Who is taller? Nathaniel by five whole inches.
Who can sing better? That's close. We're both pretty good at singing hymns in church, and that's it.
Who does the laundry? Nathaniel.
Who pays the bills? Nathaniel, unless it's a hospital bill. Then my dad pays it.
Who sleeps on their right side? We both sleep on all sides.
Who mows the lawn? Well, we rent, so we don't know yet. However, I have never mowed a lawn in my life and I intend to keep it that way.
Who cooks dinner? If dinner is actually cooked, it's never Nathaniel's doing.
Who drives? Nathaniel. But I've been driving more lately.
Who is more stubborn? I think one of the things that attracted us to each other is how we both love a good debate and we love to argue with each other. So we're both stubborn, and we like it that way.
Who kissed who first? He totally kissed me first. I didn't mean to let him.
Who asked who out first? He asked me out first. I didn't know his name at that point.
Who proposed? Hard to say. Of course Nathaniel did the asking in the official proposal (at which point we already had the temple reserved), and he's the one who brought up marriage first, but I was the one who wanted to get married at the end of August. That was the middle of August, and we weren't engaged yet.
Who has more friends? Nathaniel. He has lived in the same place all his life, practically, so he still has his elementary school friends.
Who is more sensitive? Nathaniel says me. I don't know.
Who has more siblings? I always thought I had a lot of siblings until I met Nathaniel. There are nine kids in his family, and six in mine. So he wins.
Who wears the pants? Nathaniel. He's always laying the smackdown.

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Frustration

So I felt like this yesterday:
Not only did someone steal my book from my car, but I got my car stuck in a ditch. Fortunately, I opened one of my carrel drawers and I located by book that I was sure someone had stolen, and my husband backed my car out of the ditch without a problem. But fake problems can be just as frustrating as real problems, don't you agree?

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Nathaniel says...

I am not a pedophile who misses Ukraine. There's more to me than this but my wife for some reason doesn't want you to know who I really am.

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Chron's Disease

I have Chron's disease. It's a chronic illness but rarely fatal, except in really old people. I am going to try to explain what it's like to have Chron's disease.

Usually, it's like this:
I really wish I had a picture of me jumping in the air and looking all happy, but this will do. Usually, I forget that I have Chron's disease and I lead a very normal life.

But sometimes, it just hurts. It's a pain that feels like popcorn is popping in my stomach. Sometimes it's not too bad, other times it kills and I can't do anything. Sometimes it lasts for ten seconds, sometimes for a few hours (not much longer because if it lasts for a few hours I usually take a pretty heavy-duty drug [steroids] to kill the pain).

Once, things went really wrong, and this happened:



Just kidding, that's my brother-in-law getting into his wife's stuff. This is what happened:

and this:



I look like death, I know. I feel so much better now. For the most part, better than I did before the surgery. But the scary thing about Chron's disease is that it doesn't go away. But, all I can do is to take care of myself and hope for the best.

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So this is a blog...

When I came back to BYU from my mission at the beginning of 2006, a completely new word had entered everyone's vocabulary: blog. And here I am, just two and a half years later, starting one. I guess I should say we, because the only reason I'm doing this is because Nathaniel told me I should. I guess he wants to let his thousands of family members know what we're up to. The problem is that mid-semester, our lives are rather boring. There's school, work, school, dates on the weekend, school, trying to go snowboarding enough to get our money's worth out of our passes, school, and that's about it. But if anything exciting does happen, we'll write it here.

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